Michael Jackson Isn’t Feeling The Recession

With stock prices bouncing up and down and the sub-prime mortgage crisis causing the value of homes to plummet, it’s a damn good time to have some extra cash laying around. Personally, if I had an extra couple million laying around I would just buy GM, get super hammered and drive Corvettes around on their testing tracks all day. What I wouldn’t do with an extra million is sign a $1.2 million lease on a house in L.A… but hey, that’s just me.

Michael Jackson decided to opt for the 2nd option recently, signing a $100,000 a month lease on a Beverly Hills home. The house apparently has 7 bedrooms, 13 bathrooms, 12 fireplaces and a Jesus juice wine cellar, which is convenient for getting little boys drunk and playing with their tiny wieners throwing wine tasting parties.

It may not be Neverland, but it will have to do. Michael Jackson has leased a Bel-Air mansion for $100,000 a month, according to his manager-spokesman Tohme Tohme. The pop icon wanted to be closer to “where all the action is” in the entertainment industry, the spokesman said.

The gated estate that Jackson is leasing was one of the most expensive houses listed for sale last year in Los Angeles but was withdrawn from the market after the Gloved One signed a year’s lease.
Jackson’s temporary shelter is a French chateau estate built in 2002. It has seven bedrooms, 13 bathrooms, 12 fireplaces and a theater. There is a multistory grand entry, hardwood floors, a formal dining room, wood-paneled den and adjoining library with coffered ceilings. The state-of-the-art kitchen has an adjacent butler’s pantry. There is also a wine cellar and tasting room — and nary a Ferris wheel or exotic animal in sight.
As for Jackson’s famous Neverland compound that hovered on the brink of foreclosure for an eternity: In November it was widely reported that he surrendered title to the Neverland Ranch, which made the new owner the Sycamore Valley Ranch Co. — a joint venture between Jackson and an affiliate of Colony Capital LLC. The 120-acre estate in the hills outside Santa Barbara once featured a zoo and roller coaster but fell into disrepair when Jackson left the area for Bahrain after he was acquitted on child molestation charges in 2005.

I’m trying to figure out why anyone would even think about leasing a house at this price when mansions are going for almost the same amount. At this point, who knows what’s going on in Jackson’s head. Maybe we’ll get lucky in the next couple of years and he’ll pop out another album like Thriller or Off The Wall… either that or he’ll molest another series of little boys, go fucking bat shit, convert religions again, almost drop his baby off a balcony and lose his house/theme park/bait for children to get lured in make a poor album.

Tags: 90210, beverly hills, child molestation, LA, lease, michael jackson, Neverland Ranch, new home