How bored are we? On our amazing Google trend datalist, there is without fail more than 20 celebrity break-up rumor searches every day. I don’t even care when someone I KNOW breaks up with a significant other; why would I give one splash of whiz about people I don’t know?
Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are denying that they, too, are splitting up. Who fucking cares? Does someone sit around their apartment, turn down the volume on Judge Joe Brown and decide to be completely useless and start unmitigated rumors all day long? Well, congrats, you waste of fucking life, here’s your 15 minutes. I MENTIONED YOU. Welcome…make yourself at home. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be off READING A BOOK. It’s a good one too. Dostoyevsky’s Notes From the Underground. Maybe I’ll start a rumor that ol’ Fyodor boned his own mother. Rumor mills will be LABORING on that one.