Did Beyoncé Ruin Christmas?!

By Stephanie McKinny

I’ve heard some stories about Beyoncé and how she’s a raving twatbag behind the scenes, but now my evil hopes and dreams seem to be coming to fruition. Miss Sasha Fierce is now the target of a $100 million lawsuit solely for her bitchy diva ways. A video game company called Gate Five LLC is accusing her of backing out of a deal she allegedly signed last year. See, they were banking on her ass, and her ass alone, because the game is/was/whatever called Starpower: Beyoncé. But it seems like people back out of deals all the time, right? Yeah, well… they’re saying she backed out a week before Christmas, leaving them to pass out pink slips like crusty ass holiday fruit cakes to 70 employees on the spot and causing the whole company to go under. The summons filed last Tuesday reads:

“[Beyoncé] made an extortion demand for entirely new compensation terms she suddenly decided she wanted.”

Surprise, surprise – a rich person wanted even more money. But what of tiny Tim Cratchit?

“Her actions were so unscrupulous that her then manager renounced them, while a senior executive of the company that had agreed to finance the project condemned her conduct as ‘morally reprehensible’.”

We’ll see how this turns out. Either Beyoncé is a cold-hearted beeotch whose heart shrunk three times that day, or this is just another instance of a company trying to siphon some greenbacks. Either one is totally believable.

Tags: Beyonce, Diva, video game