Baseball cards ain’t what they used to be.

I used to collect baseball cards when I was a kid because, well, every dude does at some point. I am a HUGE baseball fan and some of my fondest memories were opening up a pack of 89′ Donruss and seeing a cool new Rated Rookie, and a Will Clark or Mark McGuire. I studied the stats like a nerd, and compared collections with my friends. I started keeping track of a lot of player’s careers, and learned a ton about the game.

I stopped collecting over time because I grew pubes and started being more interested in trying to get girls to let me touch their boobs and actually playing baseball then looking at a bunch of pictures of adult males on cards. But today I was in a candy store and saw a pack of Topps, and decided I was going to re-live a bit of my youth, so I bought it.

First of all it was 2 fucking dollars! Bull shit! I don’t want to sound old or anything (but I’m old as fuck) but when I bought cards they were 75 cents. But whatever, it’s been a while. But then I opened up the pack and there was a grand total of SEVEN cards inside. SEVEN! RIP OFF!!!

So I paid about 28 cents per card and got a couple of mildly decent ones, but in general I feel ripped off. When I have a kid I ain’t shelling out 2 bucks a pack for that shit. I’m telling his ass to get on the tube and watch Baseball Tonight on ESPN and learn from Peter Gammons’ old ass.

I did get a piece of bubble gum that was surprisingly fresh though, which I’m chewing now, so it wasn’t a total loss I guess.

Tags: Aaron Hill, baseball, baseball cards, C.C. Sabathia, Chase Utley, Luis Mendoza, Miguel Tejada, mlb, Omar Vizquel, rip off, Ryan Howard, Topps, Willie Randolph